Tuesday, June 10, 2014


Ok Blogger. Since you deleted my first draft.... Let's try this again....

My Internet has been down since before I got home for work.  I was pretty mad too, because I had this plan to come home and veg out, watching tv until I went to bed, while playing on my phone and the computer.

That's my nightly routine. Technology until bedtime,  and then more technology. Come home, turn on tv, check phone, computer, back to phone, bed, tablet, phone.

When did my life start to revolve around technology?  I spend most of my day, doing nothing online. Seriously.  I check Facebook on my phone,  then get on my computer, just to check Facebook. 

 I meditated for the first time in months today.  I probably wouldn't have if my phone had held more of a charge.  But I meditated. And then decided to write this post.  But not before checking Facebook.  When did I become obsessed with social media?

I've been planning a Skype coffee date with my friend D for months. Still hasn't happened. But I can tell you what she did over the weekend, because of Facebook. I talk to more people on Facebook than I do in real life. And let's be honest, it's not official until it's Facebook official.

 So here's my challenge to myself, and to you.  For one day, don't check Facebook.  Not even if you get a notification.  Better yet, deactivate your account for a day. Is it someone's birthday? Pick up the phone and call them. Reconnect with those you don't talk to outside of the internet. Change the way we interact.

"The difference between technology and slavery is that slaves are fully aware that they are not free." -- Nassim Nicholas Taleb


Why is society more obsessed with these heightened, manufactured situations than they are with actual reality?

I love this show.  It puts a nice spin on everything happening in the world.  But this episode really spoke to me this morning.  While surfing the internet, and goofing on Facebook, I kept seeing news about Halle Berry being ordered to pay child support to her ex-husband to take care of her child.  Why is this news?

Looking through the news feed, I can see a ton of stories that are way more important than Halle Berry's lawsuit, like the five soldiers who were killed by friendly fire, or that the FAA has approved a commercial drone to fly over Alaska looking for natural resources. 

Why are we as a society so obsessed with the lives of the rich and famous?  Why do we watch shows about Honey Boo Boo and a bunch of idiots in Jersey Shore, but don't watch the news?  Friends of mine think that I am weird because I make sure to read the news every day, from different news sources, to make sure I understand what's going on.  Half my friends don't even watch the news. 

With all the technology that allows us to watch, read, and listen to the news, and have news delivered to our phones, I am completely baffled over some of the breaking news articles that come over my phone.  Who cares if JB is getting deported, or if Lindsay told Miley to calm her roll.... I certainly don't.

Do me a favor: Google "World Cup" and look at the news articles.  People are trying to get FIFA to go elsewhere, for fear that it will collapse its economy, much like what happened in South Africa.  Google "veteran affairs" and you can see that delays on medical treatment for vets are causing huge issues.

Education is supposed to show the advancement of a society.  I feel like most of our society are becoming drones, eating whatever is fed to us, through reality television and faux news programs.  People really need to start thinking for themselves, and questioning everything.

"Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suit on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourselves. Choose your future. Choose life." -- Irvine Welsch (Trainspotting)

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Human decency


When did it become okay as a society to treat everyone as if you are better than they?  As if you were worth more, demand more time and attention, or simply are more than your neighbor? 

I struggle to understand why we, as Americans, find it so hard to help others in need.  Why we lie, cheat, scheme, and destroy to get what we think we deserve.  You see stories about guys pretending to be homeless, panhandling on the side of the road, earning close to $100,000 a year (without taxes), while a mother with four children, working two jobs, struggles to keep the lights on.  People are getting stabbed, shot, injured, all because of the negligence and hatred of others.  Countries are falling apart, and the Kardashians just made another million because of the Kim/Kanye wedding.

This week alone, I have seen this to be true on several occasions.  While out with friends, I watched a girl throw her drink on a guy just because he said she was emotional.  She then ran to her fiancé (seriously) and told him.  That dude came outside, and started a fight with the first guy.  I applaud the first guy for being calm, and standing his ground, and not engaging in a fight.  It was incredible to see someone who knew that they were right just blow the other person off, just to avoid issues.  Last night, my friend E posted on Facebook that some girl was trying to start stuff with her at the bar.  That post had so many comments on it.... it was ridiculous how much people fed into the drama.

Maybe I'm getting too old for the bullshit, maybe I have this Utopian hippie dream that peace will come, and that humans will learn to be decent and respect one another, maybe I'm naïve and idealist.  Whatever the case may be, I still believe in the goodness of people.  I still believe that we are all connected, and that we need to work together to save our Mother Earth.  I still believe in the Disney fairy tale ending.

I just find it ridiculous how decency can be such a foreign language now.  A few months back, I was at Subway, getting lunch, and the guy in front of me was having trouble with his card.  I told the cashier to put it on mine, and the dude was in complete shock.  He kept saying he would pay me back, and asking if I was sure about it.  Like it was some big deal.  Listen, we've all been there before.  Card's not working, line's growing longer... it's quite embarrassing.  So what is an extra $7 from my bank account?  No big deal.

Even when I am decent to people, striking up conversations, giving up my seat to someone else, people always assume there's a hidden motive.  Especially when out with friends, I am constantly questioned.... "Do you like that guy?" Why does being decent have to have an attachment to it?  Just because I am nice to you, doesn't mean that I want to sleep with you. 

When will decency make a comeback?  I think it's about time.

"I'm under the impression that this notion of decency is disappearing from our society where conflicts are made worse on cinema and on television, where people are nasty and cruel on the Internet and where, in general, everybody seems to be very angry." -- Helen Mirren

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Friends in low places?

This weekend has been an interesting one.  I moved from my place to a new place, and I found out that I value my friendships more than those on the other side.

Anyone who knows me knows that I will give you the shirt off my back to help you out.  I have gone to pick up friends because they put their car in a tree (no joke) 30 minutes away.  I have given friends money and bought them things, simply because they needed/wanted it.  I even help out complete strangers if I feel they need it.... and yet, I rarely see this act returned.

Some friends had valid reasons as to why they couldn't help me to move -- injuries, work, children.... but out of those that offered to help, three showed up (2 if you don't count my brother).  One of them was a girl that I rarely see, but she was willing to drive almost an hour to come to my old apartment, and then 20 minutes farther to my new apartment (twice). 

My friend, S., sent me a message yesterday, saying that if I was in NY, I would have had a ton of people show up, and we could've moved that place in one trip.  While I know that she would've shown, and maybe a couple others, I do not feel like that would have been entirely true.

Friendships, to me, are very important.  Being a middle child, I definitely want to be the center of attention, simply because I was starved for it as a child (just kidding... or am I?).  I am a social being, and need to have people around me on the regular.  Don't get me wrong, I love being alone, at my house, vegging out, but some nights, I just need a semi-busy place with people I adore.

Now, I'm wondering if I am just too friendly.... if people see me, and know that they can take advantage of me, because I say yes a lot.  Even as a teenager, I would take friends to the mall (even if I didn't want to go), or drive them to the swimming hole (shoving more than legally allowed in the car), just because they wanted to go.  I rarely asked for gas money, and when I did, suddenly, people didn't want to go. 

I know that I have some honestly true friends -- those that will let me call them at all hours of the night to cry (or scream); those that would come get me on the side of the road if my car broke down; those that I know no matter what I choose to do, they have my back, even if it is 3000 miles away. 

I just struggle with the idea that we, as a species, are becoming too individualized, and selfish.  Those same people who bailed on me this weekend, will be the same people pissed when I don't want to hang out with them.  But, friendships are two-way streets.  You gotta give to get.

"Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down." -- Oprah Winfrey